sighz...again..

less than 24 hours to departure...and i've not finished packing...haiz...sianz...

learnt in the afternoon that des is going to join me at RMIT, went through a mixture of happiness and sadness...happy because now my best fren is going to join me there, and after being separated in sec sch and then JC for me while poly for him...we finally ended up in the same uni...almost like we've gone full circle..hopefully this time around, our results wun be like in pri sch when we occupied the bottom two positions in class haha...i'm sad because that means he hasn't been offered a place in NTU, and now he has to go overseas too, which means alot of money going to be spent...i'm not very sure abt his financial situation because we've never really talked abt that part of our lives...strange we hadn't though....in any case, studying overseas is very expensive and there are alot of hidden costs here and there..

over the last few days, i've realised that i'm actually secretly rather apprehensive about going overseas..not really knowing what to expect and it is really very very sudden..less than a month ago i was still waiting for local unis to reply me...in less than 3 weeks i'm off to aussie to study abroad..majority of other students would have at least a couple of months to mentally prepare themselves, but i had only 2 weeks plus. if i had things my way, i would actually be going over at the end of the year, at least i would have time to fully prepare myself to overseas living, and at least things wun be so rushed. until now i'm not very sure if my visa application is indeed settled or not...it's a really weird system this eVisa thingy, do i have to print it out? if i do, what part do i print? if i don't does it mean i dun need to show anything to customs at aussie and they would already have my records? this is too weird...and mainly due to the rushed situation, i'm really really blur abt the situation....oh well...the most they deport me...

this time around, it's totally different from going over there 2 years ago...the last time everything is paid for, everything is settled and planned for me..all i needed to do was go there and fly. this time around, everything's on my own, well...right now it does seem that my parents still can help me here and there, but once over there, it'll be all me..as much as i hate to admit it, i had never been placed in this kind of situation before, and it does scare me a bit. i'm not going to see this room for quite some time...i'm going to just drop everything and leave...into a foreign place..and i know myself...i hate change...i'd grown so comfortable in singapore..if i had left last year, i'd probably feel less apprehensive as last year i actually felt weird coming back to my room..now that i've grown so attached to it..it sucks having to leave...sighz.....

will i survive? definitely...

will i be able to get the results to justify the amount of money spent on me? i hope so.....

i just dun wanna let my parents and sister, my whole extended family down again...

Please God, help me..i can't do this alone..i need Your help...please God..

"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose" Romans 8:28